Joy that's Coming

I have been pulled out of my darkness and sorrow and have been filled with love, hope, and joy for tomorrow from the One who has created me and who has given me life. Even though life can be difficult and contain many struggles God has great plans for His people and He will never leave them.

Jeremiah 29:11

"For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

When we are in times of turmoil and struggle the Lord will lift us up and give us the strength to carry on.

James 1:2-4

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."

An amazing song that totally describes the place that I am in my life right now and has given me hope and fills me with joy is:

Before the Morning

Josh Wilson

"Do you wonder why you have to

feel the things that hurt you

if there's a God who loves you where is He now?

Maybe there are things you can't see

and all those things are happening

to bring a better ending.

Someday some how you'll see you'll see.

Would you dare would you dare to believe

that you still have a reason to sing

cause the pain that you've been feeling

it can't compare to the joy that's coming.

So hold on you gotta wait for the light.

Press on and just fight the good fight.

Cause the pain that you've been feeling

it's just the dark before the morning.

My friend you know how this all ends.

You know where you're going.

You just don't know how you'll get there.

So say a prayer.

And hold on cause there's good for those who love God.

But life is not a snapshot.

It might take a little time but you'll see the bigger picture.

Would you dare would you dare to believe

that you still have a reason to sing

cause the pain that you've been feeling

it can't compare to the joy that's coming.

So hold on you gotta wait for the light.

Press on and just fight the good fight.

Cause the pain that you've been feeling.

It's just the dark before the morning.

Once you feel the weight of glory.

All your pain will fade to memory.

Would you dare would you dare to believe

that you still have a reason to sing

cause the pain that you've been feeling

it can't compare to the joy that's coming.

So hold on you gotta wait for the light.

Press on and just fight the good fight.

Cause the pain that you've been feeling

it's just the hurt before the healing.

Oh the pain that you've been feeling

it's just the dark before the morning."

Hope Endures

This week has been a difficult one, embedded with twists and turns, confusion and pain, stress and weariness...Reality has hit and awakened me from my fantasies and has shown me what is real and true. Although this is a magnificent aspect and allows me to move forward with my life, heartache and sorrow must first be overcome.

When my heart feels as if it open and exposed, lying on the ground, waiting for the next person to come over and stomp on it, God sends encouragement and hope to lift my broken heart up and make it whole once again. I am amazed by His awesome power and by the way in which He works through others. When I feel great despair and contain hopeless feelings God uses someone to encourage me and show me that I am loved. The timing of God is amazing and I am so very grateful for the people that He has placed in my life. He fills me up when I feel empty. He uses

His people to reach out to the hurting and helps them realize that there is hope.

He has greatly blessed His people and loves every single one of them. It is important to live in a way that demonstrates His wonderful love, mercy, and grace and pour all of these aspects out to all people.

He gives us strength in our weakness and provides us with hope to carry on. He loves His people unconditionally and it would be a beautiful thing to see everyone connected and pouring out this miraculous love to each other. God is so good and He is always here. He provides us with everything that we need and will be with us every single step of the way. So with this great love and joy that comes from Him alone, we must go and love others as He loves us.

Lamentations 3:17-24

"I have been deprived of peace; I have forgotten what prosperity is. So I say, 'My splendor is gone and all that I had hoped from the Lord.' I remember my affliction and my wandering, the bitterness and the gall. I well remember them, and my soul is downcast within me. Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope:

Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself 'The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him.'"

Our Hope Endures

Natalie Grant

"You would think only so much can go wrong

Calamity only strikes once

And you assume that this one has suffered her share

Life will be kinder from here

Sometimes the sun stays hidden for years

Sometimes the sky rains night after night

When will it clear

But our hope endures the worst of conditions

It's more than our optimism

Let earth quake

Our hope is unchanged

How do we comprehend peace within pain

Our joy at a good man's wake

Walk a mile with a woman whose body is torn

With illness but she marches on

Sometimes the sun stays hidden for years

Sometimes the sky rains night after night

When will it clear

But our hope endures the worst of conditions

It's more than our optimism

Let earth quake

Our hope is unchanged

Emanuel God is with us

El Shaddai, all sufficient

Emanuel God is with us

El Shaddai, all sufficient...

We never walk alone

This is our hope..."

Bearable Pain

Today the pain is too much for me to handle. My joints are screaming out for a relief that cannot be found. I'm sick of doctor appointments and medical tests that always leave me feeling disappointed and discouraged. Why did God give me this pain? Why couldn't He have made me "normal"? Why must I struggle so...

At this moment the one thing that I would love to do is go outside and run as far and as fast as I can. I want to feel the world speeding past me and hear my heart pounding. When I am finished my knees will not ache and I will feel energized and refreshed.

Although I cannot experience my dream of running, I can experience the feeling of being refreshed, energized, and renewed. God fills me with these wonderful feelings and even though I struggle He is right there beside me. He understands the pain that I am going through and He will use this pain to teach me something and possibly use my experiences with pain to reach out to others. Even though I am in so much pain the amazing aspect is that I still feel completely filled with the loving spirit of Jesus Christ. He fills my heart with hope and strength to carry on each day. He fills my soul with a joy that only can come from Him. He knows my deepest innermost feelings and is always comforting me. He loves me and makes me strong. I can live each day because He is in my life. I am so thankful for each day that He has allowed me to live and for all of the many wonderful blessings that He has given me. He is an amazing God.

Back at My Heart

Natalie Grant

"Strong on the outside

But coming apart at the seams

That's me.

Tragically always together

But bruised underneath

Well, that's me.

I stand just to stumble

Tripping on my pride

Why do I always try to hide?

Chorus:

Meanwhile, back at my heart

I'm desperate for all that you are

Undo me, take me apart.

Meanwhile, back at my soul

Oh mend me Lord

Please make me whole

You know just where to start

Back at my heart

Back at my heart

Patiently waiting

To pick up the pieces of me

That's You

Healer of hearts

When the world leaves it broken in two

That's You

Maker of heaven, sky and the sea

When You stretched Your arms

You reached for me, You reached for me

Chorus

You know just where to start

Back at my heart, back at my fear

Back at my brokenness Lord meet me here

Though I'm exposed , I'm not afraid anymore.

I'm desperate for all that You are

Undo me and take me apart

And meanwhile back at my soul

Mend me Lord please make me whole

You know just where to start

Back at my heart, back at my heart

Back at my heart, back at my heart

Healer of hearts

When the world leaves it broken in two

Well, that's You"

Empty Me

The end of the semester is drawing near and the craziness of life and stress begins to overwhelm me. As I feel myself becoming consumed of these things to the point of breaking, I remember the One who is in control. The things of this world are only temporary and in the whole scheme of things grades, other fears and anxieties that I hold onto do not matter. Instead of focusing on the "what ifs" in life I should be listening. I should be listening for the One who leads me and carries me through these difficult times and listen to the One who fills my soul with a calming peace and an inexplicable joy. I desire to be led by the spirit and to trust in the everlasting One who gives me strength and courage.

A passage that jumped out at me the other night was Galatians 5:16-26 and 6:1-10

Life by the Spirit

"So I say, live by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature. For the sinful nature desires what is contrary to the Spirit., and the Spirit what is contrary to the sinful nature. They are in conflict with each other, so that you do not do what you want. But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under law.

The acts of sinful nature are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity, and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit. Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other."

Doing Good to All

"Brothers, if someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore him gently. But watch yourself, or you also may be tempted. Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ. If anyone thinks he is something when he is nothing, he deceives himself. Each one should test his own actions. Then he can take pride in himself, without comparing himself to somebody else, for each one should carry his own load.

Anyone who receives instruction in the word must share all good things with his instructor.

Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. The one who sows to please his sinful nature, from that nature will reap destruction; the one who sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life. Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people especially to those who belong to the family of believers."

Reach out to the hurting and the broken. Support them and let God shine through you. Empty yourselves of the emptiness inside your hearts and fill it with the love and joy of the Spirit.

Empty Me

Chris Sligh

"...Empty me of the selfishness inside.

Every vain ambition and the poison of my pride.

And any foolish thing my heart holds to.

Empty me of me so I can be filled with you..."

All of Me

All of Me

Selah

"Holy Father.

Love me still

I have fallen from Your will.

I am broken.

Hear my humble cry, my cry.

Take my life and make it Yours oh,

fill me with your love.

You are all I need.

I surrender all of me.

I have wandered for so long.

Tired and weary on my own.

In Your arms I know I'm home.

Oh, God my God.

Take my life and make it Yours oh,

fill me with your love.

You are all I need.

I surrender all of me.

Take my life and make it yours oh,

fill me with your love.

You are all I need.

I surrender,

I surrender,

I surrender,

all of me."

This song just fills up my spirit because I know that once I surrender my whole self to God He will use me and through Him I am able to do great things.

Out of Darkness

Have you ever experienced an indescribable low in your life, where the darkness and numbness overwhelm you?

Have you ever felt so insecure and insignificant that you wondered if it would matter if you existed in this world anymore?

I recently felt this deep darkness that I could not describe and did not know why it was happening. I was suffering from depression and this was a side effect of one of my medications that I was not aware of. I have never felt that low in my entire life. It literally feels as if you are living underneath a constant rain cloud and you can see the sun but you can not feel the warmth of its rays.

My heart was awakened and a great weight was lifted off of my soul. My uncontrollable emotions and insecure heart were filled with the grace and love of God. He knows my innermost feelings and is always, always standing right there beside me. He understands why I am going through the things that I am, even when I do not. He is my strength and hope. He helps me carry on.

I am thoroughly blessed by Him. Looking back over this past year I am able to see how God has directed and guided my life. He has provided me with a wonderful community of people who never cease to amaze me with their love, encouragement, and hearts for God. If I had followed my plan, I never would have found this. He has filled me with His never-ending love and continues to encourage me and help me grow in my faith. He is my strength in my weakness and the comforter in the storm. He is my rock and will keep me from crumbling. He fills me with unexplainable joy and peace and makes me alive again. I am forever grateful for the many wonderful relationships, opportunities, and love that He has provided for me. God is love.

James 1:2-4

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trails of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."

Philippians 4:4-9

"Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."

Out of Control

At times things of this world overwhelm me. I spread myself too thin, making myself available to everyone when I should be taking time for myself, or constantly overbooking myself so that I do not have any down time. I set high expectations and am always trying to make sure that everyone is happy. Stress builds up inside of me from all of these things until I feel like I am a dam that is about to burst. I keep pressing down my emotions, but they keep coming up to the surface until I finally cannot take it any longer.

Right now I am hanging on by a small thread over a sea of turmoil, stress, and emotions. At this point I need to remember that I am not in control. I do not have the power to fix things or control how others react. I do not control my future or the things of this world. God is in control and holds all of the power. He holds each one of us in the palm of His hand and He molds us into the person that He wants us to be. He will lead me in the right direction. I may not know where He will take me but He will never leave me. He is in control. He will take away all of my pain and sorrows and will embrace me in His loving arms. He will never forsake me.

So when I feel as if the things of this world are out of my control and like I cannot do things on my own it is because I really cannot. He will lead me in the right direction and help me through all of this stress. It does not help to become stressed and upset about things because they do not matter in the big scheme of things, they are only a moment, God is forever. That is where my focus should be, I should always focus on God and focus on what He wants for me and others. Sometimes I believe that I have to be strong all the time and that crying demonstrates to the world that I am weak. The truth is that I am weak and I'm beginning to realize that it is ok for me to cry. God will be strong for me and comfort me. I cannot rely on "my own strength" because it is not mine at all. It all comes from God.

Every Single Tear

~Scott Kirppayne

"You feel insignificant, a whisper in the wind.

Sometimes you think nobody knows your name.

But there's somebody watching over you.

And he knows everything you're going through.

He sees every single tear.

He feels everything you're feeling.

He wants to hold you close and dry your eyes.

Oh your heart is what he hears when the world just sees you crying.

No matter what the pain he cares about every single tear.

Overwhelmed by circumstances out of your control.

Hope can be the hardest thing to find.

When you're like a heart without a home.

You don't have to face this hurt alone.

He sees every single tear.

He feels everything you're feeling.

He wants to hold you close and dry your eyes.

Oh your heart is what He hears when the world just sees you crying.

No matter what the pain He cares about every single tear.

If God adorns the lilies of the fields.

And cares for every sparrow in the sky.

How much more is He aware of your sorrow and despair.

How much does He care about your life.

He sees every single tear.

He feels everything you're feeling.

He wants to hold you close and dry your eyes.

Oh your heart is what He hears when the world just sees you crying.

No matter what the pain He cares about every single tear."

Loved

I am amazed by the great love that God has for his people. I cannot imagine sending my son to a world filled with such evil and hate and watching him suffer and die on a cross. He is so loving that he would take on all of the sin and burdens of this world and put them on His shoulders so that one day through Him, we may be pure and blameless and live everlastingly.


He intricately created each living thing and gave them a name and place in life. How amazing and awesome is He.


A passage that reminds me of how much love and compassion our great God has for people is Luke 19:9-10.


"Jesus said to him, 'Today salvation has come to this house, because this man, too, is a son of Abraham. For the Son of Man came to seek and to save what was lost.'"


These verses make me feel very valuable and loved that my God would care so much for me that He is continuously seeking me. I am just a small insignificant person, yet He looks after me and wants me to come to Him, to trust Him, and love Him with my whole heart. This aspect is very humbling.


We need to love others like God loves us. We must shine for Him and show others His love in us.
Everyone deserves to be loved and to be treated as the special person that he or she is.


I recently read The Power of Pain by C.S. Lewis and found one part in particular that really struck me. "But God will look to every soul like its first love because He is its first love. Your place in heaven will seem to be made for you and you alone, because you were made for it--made for it stitch by stitch as a glove is made for a hand" (152).


This is a great image of how God loves us so much that He has made a place just for you and that He made each and every person individually special and He loves us all the same. He created you specially and you fit perfectly, like a glove for a hand.


So I am going to try and shine my light for all to see and remember the great love that God has for me.



A song that expresses the delight in God's love (unfortunately I do not know the title or artist).

"The fullness of your grace is here with me.

The richness of your beauty's all I see.

The brightness of your glory has arrived.

In your presence God I'm completely satisfied.


For you I sing and dance.

Rejoice in this divine romance.

Lift my heart and my hands to show my love.

To show my love.


The deep deep flood in a ocean flows from you.

A deep deep love yeah it's filling up the room.

Your innocent blood has washed my guilty life.

In your presence God I'm completely satisfied.


For you I sing and dance.

Rejoice in this divine romance.

Lift my heart and my hands to show my love.

To show my love.


For you I sing and dance.

I rejoice in this divine romance.

Lift my heart and my hands to show my love.

Oh and for you I sing and dance.

I rejoice in this divine romance.

Lift my heart and my hands to show my love.

To show my love.

To show my love..."